Kristine's Bulletin Post...

"it fils sad to mis sum1 badly..
especially wen both of u shared un4getble moments..

8s so sad not to fil d presnce of dat sum1..
it burns ur hart wd sch sadnes & longing..

wd ol dat burden ur goin thru,u tot ur sum1 also misses u..
but only 2 find out dat d sum1 u knew, was enjoyin' d tym w/o u :'c"

-from Kristine's textmate

I wanted to make a post to explain how much I relate to the message above. But even with all the hard thinking I did, words just wont come out. I can't think of anything. I'm quite sure of what to write about but I just can't find the right words that would perfectly describe what I'm feeling. Maybe it is true, that sometimes...

"words just aren't enough"...

Leave Out All The Rest

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I’m done here

So if you’re asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I’ve done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don’t resent me
And when you’re feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Don’t be afraid
I’ve taking my beating
I’ve shared what I made

I’m strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I’ve never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you’re asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I’ve done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don’t resent me
And when you’re feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You’ve learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can’t be who you are

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I’ve done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don’t resent me
And when you’re feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You’ve learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can’t be who you are
I can’t be who you are

Hoping for a better day...

Woke up alone today. My sisters went to work and my mom went to attend a ceremony at my brother's school. Of course dad is overseas. So when I woke up today I was alone at home.

I don't really feel sad about it (right now that is).

But I would like my day to be "happier".
I'm done 'crying over spilled milk'.
So rather than dwell on my insecurities and pity myself for being alone, I'd ought to make the most out of my life.

I'm really hoping for a better day.

Though I admit, somewhere at the back of my mind, I still cherish those people. I still want to be with them. But I already made up my mind. What I'm wishing for is truly impossible. It will get me nowhere dwelling on those thoughts.


I hope for a better day. So I pray...

Finding It Hard Adjusting...

For such a short time being away, I wonder why everything feels so different. Everything seems to have changed.

I'm still finding it hard to revert back to the way I "used to be". I find it hard to do the things I used to do here. It seems harder to study and it's hard to excel. It seems that I have no good reason to do them anymore.


It seems much harder to talk to people. It seems even much harder to express myself to others.

It's hard when you got no one to listen to you.


Has everything really changed? Or is it me who changed?


I find it hard to smile nowadays. I know I'm not happy. For one, right now I can't be with the people whom I really want to be with.

My friends, I want you to know that I sorely miss all of you. It was with you that I felt that I truly belonged.

I sorely miss all of you. I really do...

I just hope that I am somehow missed by you too...

Hot Fuzz

"Hot Fuzz is a 2007 British action comedy film written by Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright and starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost." - Wikipedia

I just saw this movie today. It was shown on HBO.
It's a very funny movie, but what made me feature it here in my blog is because I was somehow moved by the bond between the main character and his trusty friend. It amused me 'coz I now have a friend whom I think I share a similar bond with that in the movie.

I'm happy 'coz I have found my
"True Best Friend" a.k.a "Blood Brother"...
But I'm also sad 'coz we're geographically separate and there's nothing I can do about it.


Nonetheless, I'm happy to have my "Utol".
I wouldn't want it any other way.

found my drive...

It's nice to know that I have friends.

Not just ordinary friends, but REAL friends.

I now found my drive again.

It's really nice to know that they believe in me.

So I will do my best for them.

After all, I did make my promise. ^_^







(photobucket photo by rikusuka)

Jumper by Third Eye Blind

	Third Eye Blind - Jumper
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Lyrics:

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in

And if you do not want to see me again I would understand

I would understand

The angry boy a bit too insane

Icing over a secret pain

You know you don't belong

You're the first to fight

You're way too loud

You're the flash of light on a burial shroud

I know somethings wrong

Well everyone I know has got a reason

To say put the past away

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in

And if you do not want to see me again I would understand

I would understand

Well he's on the table and he's gone to code

And I do not think anyone knows

What they're doing here

And your friends have left you

You've been dismissed

I never thought it would come to this

And i, I want you to know

Everyones got to face down the demons

Maybe today

You could put the past away

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in

And if you do not want to see me again I would understand

I would understand

I would understand

I would understand

I would understand

I would understand

Understand

Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

Can you put the past away

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

I would understand

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

I would understand

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

And I would understand

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

I would understand

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

I would understand

Needing Some Love

(flickr photo by: nycnikonian007)


I've been feeling a little lonely this past few days.
After all, it's lonely being a bookman.
Most of the time you get disappointed by what other people can and cannot do.


I've been thinking 'bout my friends lately.
I sorely miss them.



And now I wonder,...
"When will I find my significant other?"...


I think I'm already at the stage in life where I should have already found a partner.
A partner who'd be there for me, in spite of all my shortcomings.




It's lonely, being a bookman.
So I guess I should start looking...

Another Goal Is Set

I never expected to learn much from my OJT...

but I ended up learning quite a lot.

But among all the things that I learned, only one thing was valuable enough, that it changed the way I think of others.

I learned the value of true Friendship.
It was there at Cebu where I got to know the friends who I now consider as the "TRUEST" among the rest.

and so, I set myself a goal.

No matter what happens, I will see them again. I will go to Batangas so that I could somehow spend some time with the friends I had missed all my life - the friends who I always wanted, but never had, until now.

I will see them again. I will be with them again. I promise...

(for: Ramjel, Jobert, Felix, Mark, Joy and Sarah)

(photo taken by Ginny Lee Magbanua at Alicia Tower Residences)